GAYE HOLUD: The Pre-Wedding Shower
Marriage is a rare and special event, not only for the bride and groom. Family members and friends come to witness this special, unique moment when two beings come to pledge their love for each other until death do them part and become as one. Up until this point, Bangladeshi weddings are more or less the same as Czech weddings. In Bangladesh, however, weddings are preceded by a special ceremony, at the end of which the bride and groom find themselves soaked from head to toe.
And so it was this past summer at the AHTSS boarding school in southeastern Bangladesh. Mayanu Marma, daughter of one of the school’s employees, married her sweetheart Uchimong Khyang. The day before the wedding,they underwent the GAYE HOLUD (literally “yellow on the body”) ceremony, the origins of which can be found in Hinduism. Today, the purpose of the pre-wedding ceremony is to make the bride and groom more beautiful, bring their families and friends closer together, and to get everything ready for the big day.
Uchimong and Mayanu’s wedding took place on a podium that had been decorated in advance in a warm, informal atmosphere. The groom’s family and friends (but not the groom) set out on a solemn procession to the bride’s house, where they met her friends. They brought the bride her wedding dress, jewelry, gifts, sweets, and a yellow paste made of turmeric, which the groom touched beforehand. The bride, Mayanu, was then brought to the podium and to the sound of music, her hands and feet were decorated with various designs using henna. Guests also applied the yellow turmeric paste on her face and body.
Turmeric is known to cleanse, soften and brighten the skin, giving the bride's skin the distinctive yellow hue. It’s what gives the Gaye Holud ceremony its name, “yellowing”. Then it’s the groom, Uchimong’s turn, who undergoes the same ceremony with the bride’s family, except for the henna decorations. The bride does not attend the groom’s ceremony, nor does the groom attend the bride’s. The ceremony culminates in their meeting. The wedding guests then pour water brought from the nearby river over the bride and groom. Thus their “yellow-wet” preparation for their wedding is accomplished with great merriment.
Uchimong and Mayanu said their vows the next day during a gala wedding ceremony in the auditorium of the AHTSS boarding school. The ceremony was led by Pastor Sontosh Panah. After the bride and groom exchanged their vows and were declared husband and wife, Pastor Panah offered a prayer for the couple and blessed them.
Every guest was invited to the wedding feast, prepared by the families of the newlyweds. Guests brought gifts according to the wealth and the needs of the couple. Whether or not the gifts included a towel and “yellow remover”, no one knows. At any rate, the couple eventually went to their home to live happily ever after.
